


A ForceFul Knight

by LadyBookwormWithTeeth



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Humor, gone absolutely wrong, role play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-06
Updated: 2015-08-06
Packaged: 2018-04-13 05:36:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4509804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyBookwormWithTeeth/pseuds/LadyBookwormWithTeeth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Neal and Tink try to role play.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A ForceFul Knight

**Author's Note:**

> A gift for my beta: MaddieBonanaFana

“So what do you think?”

“…”

“Well, that is promising. So good that you have no words for it?”

“…”

“Neal?”

“I don’t think this is proper Fair Maiden attire.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because they don’t have Victoria’s Secret in the Enchanted Forest, for one. And because I’m pretty sure thongs are an unfortunately recent invention.”

“Are you seriously complaining about my choice of underwear?”

“Not at all, simply observing that I’m wearing full body armor to properly portray the Forceful Knight, but you’re playing the Fair Maiden in lingerie. Doesn’t seem fair. You could add some fabric. Just so I could, you know, rip it off your body, or-or something.”

“I am not ruining my dresses because you can’t handle buttons.”

“I _can_ handle buttons!”

“Can we please focus?”

“[sigh] Fine.”

“Good. So, I’m a Fair Maiden… innocently going about my business… bending over to pick up my basket of… magazines…”

“This role play is so accurate.”

“Shush! I’m bending over innocently.”

“…”

“Neal?”

“Yes, I’m watching.”

“[clears throat]”

“Oh, it’s my line? Okay.”

“Goodness sake…”

“I am the Forceful Knight and I am here to deflower the Fair Maiden.”

“…Yes, honey, this is the plot of our role play, you don’t have to state it.”

“…You know what?”

“[squeals]”

“There!”

“What the hell?!”

“I skipped to the part where I throw you on the bed and deflower you. Pretend I said clever stuff before.”

“You have to make an effort!”

“ _You_ have to make an effort! I’m already looking like the heartless tin man for you!”

“Fine! Just-just tell me what you are going to do to me, oh Forceful Knight.”

“…Oh… Naughty stuff.”

“…Liiiike…?”

“I’m going to… throw you on the bed and… take your virginity… I’m going to, you know… tie your legs open and… use you for my pleasure…”

“…”

“…Slut.”

“That… wasn’t nearly as bad.”

“…Good. Good. Because I am the Forceful Knight. I take whatever I want. I pin Fair Maidens down-”

“There we go…”

“And I have my way with them. Will this Fair Maiden spread her legs or will I have to tie her up?”

“Never you foul brute! I shall not succumb to your manly charms!”

“Then you leave me no choice but to tie you down with this rope.”

“Oh, no, please, oh, Forceful Knight, have mercy on a poor maiden.”

“Never! I will tie you down… and love you mercilessly… as soon as I… untangle this thing… damn it, it’s hard to do it with gauntlets.”

“Do you need help-”

“I got it! I got it! There we go! Now I will tie the Fair Maiden…”

“…It’s not really very tight.”

“It’s a perfect knot, Tink, don’t be so critical.”

“No, look.”

“Wha- get that foot back here!”

“Make me, oh, Forceful Knight.”

“[sigh] Goodness’ sake. There. I grabbed you and I tied you again.”

“And I escaped again.”

“…Well, fuck me! What is wrong with this rope?”

“I’m not sure it’s the rope.”

“Can’t you just pretend?”

“Nooo! That destroys the fantasy! You just have to try another knot. Here, let me show you-”

“God, Tink, if you don’t stop backseat doming, I’m going to gag you, _I swear_!”

“Ha! Where was this guy when the role play began?”

“He was too busy getting into full body armor.”

“…”

“…”

“[laughs] Oh god!”

“[laughs] We suck at this.”

“ _You_ suck at this, I’m fairly competent.”

“Maybe we should just stick to the usual stuff.”

“…Well… usual stuff with a little twist.”

“What do you have in mind? _Whoa_!”

“Stand down, brave knight! I am the Forceful Fairy! I am here to deflower the Virtuous Knight!”

“Careful Forceful Fairy! The armor is a rental.”


End file.
